Merry Christmas

Merry Christmas

The Queen commands you to have a Merry Christmas!

To all of our readers, we wish you the Merriest of Christmas (and if you don’t celebrate Christmas, we wish you the best possible day as well!). We thought we would share our “Twas the Night Before Christmas – Herd Style” that was published last year (oh, sure, it also provides our official writer a day off).

So, once again, with apologies to Clement Clarke Moore, we offer our own, Herd version of “A Visit from St. Nicholas”:

Twas the Night Before Christmas – Herd Style

‘Twas the night before Christmas, when all through Chez Herd
Not a Siberian was howling, not even a word;
The stockings were hung very high out of reach,
In hopes that no dog would be able to breech;

The Sibes were nestled all snug in their beds;
While visions of slow squirrels danced in their heads;
I smiled and patted myself on the back,
Pleased I had actually settled the whole pack,

When out in the kitchen arose such a clatter,
I sprang from my bed to see what Typhoon did splatter.
Away through the den I flew like a flash,
Tripped over some dog toys and fell with a crash.

My head hit an object with quite a strong blow
Made the room spin wildly and tilt to and fro
When what weird vision my rattled brain provides,
But a miniature dog sled and six hungry Sibes,

Frightful was the driver in the upheaval,
For it was, of course, Queen Natasha the Evil.
More rapid than Frankie in avoiding any blame,
She whistled, and shouted, and called them by name:

“Now, Kiska! Hurry while hu-dad is in a swoon.
On, Qannik, Cheoah, Frankie and lil’ Typhoon!
To the top of the couch! to the top of the wall!
Wreak havoc, wreak havoc, wreak havoc to all!”

As leaves that before the wild hurricane fly,
When they meet with an obstacle, leap to the sky;
So up to the countertops the Sibes they flew
And took full, complete advantage of dad-hu

And then, in a twinkling, I realized their cause
The prancing and clicking of all their paws.
As I held my head, and was turning around,
Down the sliced ham and turkey came with a bound.

Food all covered with fur, and six dogs underfoot,
I decided the best choice was to stay put;
A bag of dog toys she had flung on her back,
Queen Natasha the Evil cheering her pack.

Her eyes—how they twinkled! Her dimples, how merry!
Her ears were like radar, Her cheeks all hairy!
Her droll little mouth was stuffed with stolen loot,
And sprinkles and crumbs of leftovers on her snoot;

The stump of a bone she held tight in her teeth,
And the plunder encircled her head like a wreath;
She has a cute face and an innocent smile
But all of that is designed to hide her guile.

As she climbed high to retrieve loot on the shelf,
And I laughed when I saw her, in spite of myself;
A wink of her eye and a twist of her head
Soon gave me to know I had everything to dread;

She spoke not a word, but went straight to her work,
And helped The Herd plunder the kitchen with her smirk,
And laying her paw aside the bridge of my nose,
The message was clear, I would utter no “No’s”;

She raced from the room, to her team she did bristle,
With their loot, away they all flew like a missle.
But I heard them exclaim, ere they dove out of sight—
“Happy Christmas to all, and to all a good night!”

9 Comments

  1. Mom 'n Ice on December 26, 2014 at 1:20 am

    Mom sez: OMG, the “Head Pictures, the Head Pictures”! Hope you ALL had a wonderful, warm, MERRY CHRISTMAS!

  2. Beth on December 25, 2014 at 9:34 pm

    Love it!!

  3. Sam on December 25, 2014 at 9:24 pm

    Bwahaha – it’s a classic!

    Merry Christmas!

    Monty and Harlow

  4. Denise Schoen on December 25, 2014 at 5:07 pm

    Love your poem. Enjoy reading about your herd all year long. Thank you very much for sharing their, and your, adventures. Happy Holidays to all of you!

  5. DJ riendeau on December 25, 2014 at 9:59 am

    And Merry Christmas to you Hu-Dad and the Herd! Loved your poem and many thanks for your blog!

  6. achieve1dream on December 25, 2014 at 9:25 am

    Yes ma’am! Merry Christmas!!

  7. The Martins on December 25, 2014 at 9:17 am

    Awesome picture! (And love the Herd version of the poem) Merry Christmas Herd from Nikita Petite Louve and Katie!

  8. Patty Thomas on December 25, 2014 at 8:04 am

    LOL I would totally buy this as an illustrated book! It was funny enough picturing it in my head as I read. Merry Christmas from our pups to yours! 🙂

  9. Zoe Dtaughom on December 25, 2014 at 7:38 am

    Brillant !!!!

    Joyous Noel to you and yours

Leave a Comment





Read Another Story

← Back One Story ◊ OR ◊ Forward One Story →

Hu-Dad's Novels

His books pay for our food!