Twas the Night Before Christmas – Herd Style

With our apologies to Clement Clarke Moore, we offer our own, Herd version of “A Visit from St. Nicholas:”

Look innocent.
Queen Natasha the Evil in the Christmas Spirit

‘Twas the night before Christmas, when all through Chez Herd
Not a Siberian was howling, not even a word;
The stockings were hung very high out of reach,
In hopes that no dog would be able to breech.

The Sibes were nestled all snug in their beds;
While visions of slow squirrels danced in their heads;
I smiled and patted myself on the back,
Pleased I had actually settled the whole pack,

When out in the kitchen arose such a clatter,
I sprang from my bed to see what Typhoon did splatter.
Away through the den I flew like a flash,
Tripped over some dog toys and fell with a crash.

My head hit an object with quite a strong blow
Made the room spin wildly and tilt to and fro
When what weird vision my rattled brain provides,
But a miniature dog sled and six hungry Sibes,

Frightful was the driver in the upheaval,
For it was, of course, Queen Natasha the Evil.
More rapid than Frankie in avoiding any blame,
She whistled, and shouted, and called them by name:

“Now, Kiska! Hurry while hu-dad is in a swoon.
On, Qannik, Cheoah, Frankie and lil’ Typhoon!
To the top of the couch! to the top of the wall!
Wreak havoc, wreak havoc, wreak havoc to all!”

As leaves that before the wild hurricane fly,
When they meet with an obstacle, leap to the sky;
So up to the countertops the Sibes they flew
And took full, complete advantage of dad-hu

And then, in a twinkling, I realized their cause
The prancing and clicking of all their paws.
As I held my head, and was turning around,
Down the sliced ham and turkey came with a bound.

Food all covered with fur, and six dogs underfoot,
I decided the best choice was to stay put;
A bag of dog toys she had flung on her back,
Queen Natasha the Evil cheering her pack.

Her eyes—how they twinkled! Her dimples, how merry!
Her ears were like radar, Her cheeks all hairy!
Her droll little mouth was stuffed with stolen loot,
And sprinkles and crumbs of leftovers on her snoot;

The stump of a bone she held tight in her teeth,
And the plunder encircled her head like a wreath;
She has a cute face and an innocent smile
But all of that is designed to hide her guile.

As she climbed high to retrieve loot on the shelf,
And I laughed when I saw her, in spite of myself;
A wink of her eye and a twist of her head
Soon gave me to know I had everything to dread;

She spoke not a word, but went straight to her work,
And helped The Herd plunder the kitchen with her smirk,
And laying her paw aside the bridge of my nose,
The message was clear, I would utter no “No’s”;

She raced from the room, to her team she did bristle,
With their loot, away they all flew like a missile.
But I heard them exclaim, ere they dove out of sight—
“Happy Christmas to all, and to all a good night!”

20 Comments

  1. Juno's mom on December 22, 2021 at 12:58 pm

    I remember that story. Your writing always creates a mental movie.

  2. Debbie & Miss Ruby on December 22, 2021 at 7:47 am

    This is so funny! Anyone that has ever had more than 2 crazy bad dogs in the house can relate.

  3. Jean Burkhardt on December 22, 2021 at 6:33 am

    What a GREAT way to start my day!!! I laughed so hard the tears still roll down my face!!! This poem Hu-Dad is a masterpiece of laughs and of course of a Merry Christmas to all statement!! Back then and of course now-The Thundering Herd always will enjoy a wonderful holiday!!!

  4. FiveSibesMom on December 27, 2013 at 10:51 pm

    Love it! Merry Christmas and Happy New Year to the Herd!

  5. Playing with the Big Dogs on December 25, 2013 at 10:50 am

    This is fantastic! Really brightened my Christmas day at work.

  6. Brenda Weddle on December 25, 2013 at 3:11 am

    This is the best! Talk about howling, I was – with laughter! this is so right on! One thing you can say – with Sibes you’re never bored, lol!

  7. Jo Helms on December 25, 2013 at 1:05 am

    Terrific !! Absolutely love it. Merry Christmas to you all as well…Hugs, wags, and wooo’s to all.
    Jo, Barry, Tundra, and Angels Grizz, Sarge, and Kodi, in shining spirit

  8. Jenna,Mark “HuskyCrazed” Drady on December 25, 2013 at 12:33 am

    BOL!!!!! I just loved reading that!!!! Great job!!!
    ((Husky hugz)) and a very merry Christmas to u!

  9. carmen on December 25, 2013 at 12:06 am

    Very creative. Merry Christmas to the Herd from Red Clay Huskies!

  10. Khyra on December 24, 2013 at 11:46 pm

    Just another day in Maggie Valley paradise!

    Happy HOWLiday!

    Hugz&Khysses,
    Khyra

  11. KB on December 24, 2013 at 11:25 pm

    You are truly talented. That is so good – and so funny!

    I wanted to wish you, one of my longest term blogging friends, a Merry Christmas.

    Your friends,
    R, Shyla, and KB

  12. Ron on December 24, 2013 at 7:37 pm

    OK, was laughing so hard I fell and smacked my head. Lots of stars out there right now. Lucky for us our crew is still out in their run and I am going to hide the puters before they come in for their night house time so they don’t get a chance to read this. Of course, they probably already have and may have even had a hand in the composition .. mind control you know. Where is my beanie when I need it? Oh Yeah it got all bent out of shape when I hit my head.

    Merry Christmas from the Horde to the Herd.

  13. Zoe and Marilyn on December 24, 2013 at 4:31 pm

    Oh, that was just excellentl!

  14. DJ, Cierra and Maggie on December 24, 2013 at 12:54 pm

    That was truly a wonderful and funny story! Merry Christmas to the herd and to the Humans who cater to every need and whim of the herd!

  15. Sea Wolf on December 24, 2013 at 12:29 pm

    OMG. The CHAOS! A perfect sibe Christmas. May the Herd be peaceful tonight.

  16. Dr. Liz on December 24, 2013 at 10:09 am

    A happy ending for everyone! Merry Christmas to you all!

    -Dr. Liz, Fiona, Abby and Gary (the silent but tolerant husband)

  17. Juno's mom on December 24, 2013 at 9:45 am

    You’re so creative!

  18. Furbabys on December 24, 2013 at 8:56 am

    Awwwww 🙂 Merry Christmas To The “Thundering Herd” and their Hu~Dad <3

  19. Andrea on December 24, 2013 at 6:38 am

    Absolutely brilliant! Merry Christmas to our favorite Herd.

  20. jane niederstadt on December 24, 2013 at 5:39 am

    OMG! That is just too funny. Merry Christmas to the herd and their humans. Have a wonderful Christmas and I hope Santa brings lots of goodies and toys. Hugs and kisses to the herd.

Leave a Comment





Read Another Story

← Back One Story ◊ OR ◊ Forward One Story →

This Week's Thundering Herd Special Features

Monday Musing

Weekly thoughts from our Hu-Dad with the latest updates on his writing projects, the books he's reading, and a gratuitous dog photo of us.

Choosing Snowstorms Over Hurricanes

January 16, 2022

After our two-year experiment of living on the coast, we are back in our beloved mountains choosing snowstorms over hurricanes.

Way Back Wednesday

Each week, we reach back into our vault of over 4,500 previous posts and share a favorite. We hope you enjoy this look back.

Suppertime Dance

March 5, 2014 |

A young Typhoon engaging in a Siberian Husky Suppertime Dance with a twist—an eight foot vertical leap over and over.

Visit Millerton, a fictional small town near Asheville NC, via D.K. Wall's novels. Ordinary people. Extraordinary events.